rumination ii

to breathe

in your aura

the smell of your hair

the rough of your chest

peek a boo huff in your voice

the way you look down

to catch my breasts

in your hungry mouth

to breathe a past

and let it go

floating like ashes

when we were lovers

and we were kings

but time is not a lady

who waits for those who fear

of losing life

to breathe a future

where i am lost

without my lover

without my king

did you go away from me

to make me kneel

and see me bend

in the blackness of

night’s bitter drink

element

if the rust stained bones in my frame

were to ever get a chance again

to glide across the universe

look into Pandora’s jet white eyes

and smell the lighted stars

like people sniff the roses

my soul to keep i’d give away

to plug the holes

and pave new ways

for dusk to kiss the lonely hearts

for dawn to inter the bitter crop

from where my old roots are rotted

i’d be a renegade of love again

with bombs of ear drums

i would fight

to give a spot to everyone

in God’s angelic choir

if the sacred morning dew

can forgive me

for not being wide awake

in baptizing my sinful state

in the worldly river of life

reason being i was up all night

marching behind my sisters and brothers

blinded by the poisoned dark

with intent to guide them out

of their imposed upon madness

or if the maidens of the light

would prefer to bring me back

i would want to be

a lightning bolt

looking to correct

the wicked negatives of the cold hard ground

with the positives in the celestial clouds

to quench the crops of kindness

that are drying out

yet in all honesty

i’d be more than content

to come back as a rainbow colored bubble

making some kid laugh

half hearted

violet sky soft feather wind

on shore at the foot of the valley

cactus tufts where birds will nest

upon the arrival of the spring

i like the granules of sand

monochromatic browns and blacks

the tiny pebbles silent lay

in them frozen codes of time

and how i got to be here

in a universe so universal

bowing my head

mantra in brain

sacred sounds surround the plains

my thoughts interrupted

as a dusty Slurpee cup blows by

let me count the ways

pic by mbrazfield (c) 2019

life you have this annoying way of walking by as i’m trying to see a point of view prescribed by a cold and sterile man

take today for instance i’m just whistling by on my way to the corners pungent with wet filth and frothy with human madness

every prophet will eventually go back to her house yet i am neither saint nor prophet but just a sinner looking for faith

here in front of me stands the place where we yes you my soul conscience and mind dwindled childhood away waiting for the unknown without fear bloated with arrogance

the purge

get lost

Love

away with you

i’ve packed your bags

your cab is called

get the fuck out of my way

let me place

my bourbon on this table

and no i don’t use your coasters

i’m done with you

i refuse to wait

no more a fool

my time is out

for years and years

and seven fold

i crawled on knees

i soiled my soul

for you to hold me

i yearned for you

i cried for you

i died for you

so many many times

and in the darkest times

when i thought you cared

you tricked me

with a warm hand

a kind lie

or a fake kiss

i ran away

and groveled

and that one time

a torrid past

with three or four

i shared your bed

thinking i was special

but now i’m grown

and have found

a better lover

he’s cold and dull

and never calls

but never yells

or hits or tells

me how imperfect i am

i adore him

the only loyal one

Solitude

reading Oscar Zeta at the park

sand sifts time valleys blue sound boom traveled since a day before creation the key to who i am at the heat level gamma ray infra black sultana of defiance pigs are rarely ever pink but they always seems to think and they do fly in their communal memory did me know that opposites detract on the sidewalk chalk does not point to the killers as they always wrote in plumes

recusants you and i

pic by mbrazfield (c)2019

night drive slow speed

body tired windows bleed

city light a million times

soul sucker dynamite

blare the sin out from below

steel cold brick you sunk me

my fingers crooked now

with the countdown of this town

but don’t underestimate

the heart mine least of all

look me in the silence of that eye

i dare you to deny

that after you’ve torn

us both down

spit on our ancient right

that a tree of force will not emerge

from where my human blood’s been shed

from where my love everlasting powerful

and pure will for all of time

triumph over you

and our perversions