years buried deep within the flesh of my eyes but here we are what can our relation be the snows of ruin set atop my head a mere empty mausoleum nursing images of the atrocities committed to a soul and still you gaze up at nothing with such devoted stare a foundling am i to you instead what to say to stave off the pain of the roads ive dared to wander yes into your eyes id smile and say no one will ever hurt you again words a cocktail of anesthesia a wonderland never to reveal itself my name for you is kid i am your shadow your scout your secret service slave kid you will never be alone again but the poison runs too deeply in my veins good intentions this time will drive us both to a new and improved hell where the earth is windy with dirt
there isn’t very much straw in the city but if there was itd be soggy with tears decent people tears bleeding heart tears drug dealer tears whore and cop tears the church folks would cry and everyone in between would have a good weep wait there might be some straw in Compton folks there have horses too not many know that walking in the city can be hazardous to someone’s health it all depends if one swings back or has Harbor Freight pepper spray at the ready some old women have tasers the young ones have entitlement the smart ones move about their day straw is not readily available with Cal Fresh or EBT GR only goes so far if you gotta choose between a rock or an ass beat some get both but what there is in the city are cheap holiday decorations the Chinese devised a plastic wreath for every possible engagement a few years back contained within the safe haven of the 99 Cent Only Stores now found in the gutters trash heaps and several encampments no there indeed isn’t any straw in the city
have you ever seen more dark than light she asked his reply sarcastic and dry a yes without decorum in those shacks with open curtains woks and screaming babies (he realized all children cry in the same language of despair) but it’s tropical down there she quips not in Sam’s heart of darkness what else have you lost along the way she’d like to know while searching for her own methadone he chuckles guzzles tokes and chokes deep breath let’s out and sighs my sense of dignity my honor and my soul a stare directed at the sun and down to her dirty finger nails while cupping the hem of her see through dress i lost my children she said i’ve been hidden from myself and by my hand they have been guiding the scope of my gun my logic and mind his army green matches the color of gangrene settled on the meat of his left thigh unsolicited and void of tone my daddy killed my momma is her response i think it was on account of that war poppa fought in 64 painfully he struggles to get up climbing the wall where so many have deposited their sorrows not looking anywhere in particular he searches quietly for another place to hide
there is no hope you’ve broken it the heart can only take so much it seems tears well but never leap over anymore tears in the spirit of the soul continue to follow jagged reality that they won’t be ever repaired my hands shaking slightly more each night infected by your deceitful stripes blue white red from toe to head my lady you’ve betrayed me luring me with poisonous tongue rusing me with my own guile until i bleed my own blood from me America you hurt me America my vengeful mother America you spit on me you don’t want the People to be stare me in my face curse me when i needed you to tell me i must carry out the execution of my own freedom by suicide of my spirit’s conscience there are no waves of warmth or golden fields of life sustaining grain only green mile slabs of shitted on concrete for you to watch us dying off the fat of the land America the root of our starvation America high on meth and ignorance America call off your pharisees that govern what should become of me just shoot me at the foot of dawn at least then Anubis would be there to greet me America who do you love? America i know who you hate America we are both lost and i could not let you go down alone since my first American flag enamel pin at Disneyland such a long time ago (was it just a dream) my devotion to you and none other the pledging every morning began as i followed you like a pack of wolves my Doris Day Huxtables Elvis America ever so closely America you had me then you let me go America you beat me you let my people shit on me America you brainwashed me through my nanny Hollywood now i a dissenter infidel rogue gypsy in my own land your homicidal womb America don’t forget i your rotten fruit has yet to be composted by your deceitful self righteous hands America, this a good bye save your rehearsed tears in spite, i will always love you
soldier is it enough to chain children take old women beat working men? soldier is it enough to kill your brother sister father mother in their birth land? soldier is it enough to wear a blindfold rancid with the shit of a man who wipes his ass with what is sacred? soldier is it enough to allow your self determination to be sodomized by simple minds? soldier is it enough to foist your fists upon those born beaten down and unrepresented? soldier what is your pain that you willingly trespass righteousness? soldier why are you angry in desperation to defend a country for a man who will decide you will be next to the slaughter block? soldier why have you given up your mother’s kind teachings on how to be a real American man?
it’s morning 3:19 the night whimpers from it’s crucifixtion in the sky we the restless on Main paralleled Broadway sister witnesses to the brooding eyes it’s a good time to smother the thoughts of hank william’s weeping moon two birds and a falling star as if the universe dropped and disappeared we shut our eyes feebly make protective signs in the air while following the procession with electromagnetic Tujungas wearing withered gowns weaved of the failed tourniquets that abandoned the Braves and so now here we are dying of the fat of the land
there is a blue bird vagabond some say bad motherfucker stepping strong others have yet to hear how he chirps to those songs of old Lou Reed soft spoken when he chews on the worm self imposed exile in the cage forged from fleeting truths decoy soul within the vulture kettle there is a blue bird wanderer hopping from dream to dream pecking at the hollow of his heart in hopes of softening the cruel stare of abandoned turtledoves
it is not desired to submit to the maze some how survival of the organism depends upon it it is not of merit to walk alone but at times it’s necessary none the wiser are my thorns that i caress and polish them although there’s rubbish in my soul a gentle apocalypse sometimes wanders within and incinerates my soiled heart there will be no ashes the electromagneticity of electrons have silently dimmed away what can be said of Los Angeles skies that my eyes have cried about
words less spoken 