PTHH SERIES <8>
DTLA
holes of my salvation army
i don’t want to be a Neruda love poem girl
i want my thoughts to be admired like the turquoise gold around the throat of a hummingbird
i don’t want a boy to be my knight in anything shiny valiant or stunning
i want him to see the blaze inside me through the holes of my Salvation Army black jeans
on the edge haiku
custos placitorum coronae
sorry i haven’t been by in nights
ive been on the high and drunk
running after your unrequited children
do you know how hard they live
the chance to win is really small
walking with your zombie children
we’ve learned a lot about the battle
whispering strategies into starving ears we crawl
above the city and her walls praying
dusting lime on dying children
PTHH <3>
PTHH <2>
PTHH SERIES <1>
4
when i was 4
i followed you around
my old man young
at 25 raging away
at red blooded expectation
it was on those
pavements where i walked
in my buster browns
rock hard Bazooka Joe
in my jaws learning
to crush the pain
even at 4 i
disagreed with the politics
of calling you daddy
3 hours after you
smacked my mommy in
her mouth of hate
4 was an age
of converging lives desperate
for an out away
from each other though
my post infant mind
inherently knew that this
trip would not be
the last to take
place in yours and
hers non sequitur marriage
y que
aquí estoy otra vez
magullada sangrienta venosa luchadora insaciable enojada y cansada
ciudad soy tu hija
golpeo peleo corro
a través de tus junglas de basura
con mis puños en mi corazón
causo estragos
cago en la injusticia
me parten los dientes por defenderte
pero madre, ¿dónde estás?
soy la saliva en el suelo de la taberna del trabajador
soy el sartén vacío en un callejón oscuro
soy el olor de la muerte en el poderoso dólar ciudad madre ¿dónde estás esta noche?
mis pies me sostienen frente al Hilton Biltmore Cecil Midnight Mission convertido en espejo perpetuo
los ojos de mi alma lloran seco y carmesí
pero me paro como tus raíces a través de la estrella guía de mi alma
a través de él más
yo soy tu gente
limpieza del río mosaico
mi dolor me colorea con un millón de tonos de guerra
soy tu hija
nuestra señora porciúncula
por vida y que
time my only mother
time you have been my mother
a neutral righteous witness teacher priestess
self infliction my addictions there you stood
clocking the hemorrhaging of life
you not a crying virgin
me not a prodigal child
time your love is always tough
heavy handed in my thoughts
wasted in my inner voice
you continue to birth me
unto gray colored spectacle
time a savage fighter woman mother
slowly through your passing hands
do i learn to howl with pulsing throat
all of my passion all of my rage
you guide me through this valley
in front underneath above and behind
the shadow of man
where i sit betrothed
to another day of tumultuous blessing
words less spoken 