at seven months utero blue washroom
the fists pummeled my mother’s face
she never knew i felt it too
in 71’ there was a great earth quake
they ran out and left me in
she never thought i felt it
a tiny tot no older than three suns
the girl with more suns you left me with
shoved my little hands and face
into her secret universes
nobody cared that forcefully i ate them
often told to talk about the greatness
of your perfection as a guide
remind me if you can what were your triumphs
with this backwards crazed unparentble child
other than your abandonment
for many years and as i developed into a self
defined
grotesqueness of abomination
taught by the punks the junks and queers
they are my kind they know about the record
not knowing then what i know now
this feeling i snorted it in chugged it
down with lots of gin that other feeling
i shot it up to the Lord above and took it
in the front and back from any boy as lost as i was
i took the punches curses put downs and secrets
too unsavory for the family name sake
there was a time when i yelled fuck you to
everyone around i cut the cord called you both
whores
and headed into town and here i stand until the
end that nears upon me nuzzling my throat
with words in nature cleansing
i now move up one more step of wisdom
understanding that the spark of love for you
unrequited as it was never tainted
the three sun girl can go to rest
her eyes no longer brimmed with tears but hope
words less spoken 