he loves me not

i go away tomorrow

will you not love

me three times tonight

i’ll come again to

hold your hand but

we never know our

fate or luck and

if we come to

stay for a few

hours more then what

will change in us

la cita

es muy temprano

son las cuatro

de la mañana

y las sombras

que caen afuera

hablan cosas de

mi vida y

no puedo respirar

me dicen que

usted dr. azul

es cardiólogo superior

y que me puede

diagnosticar y dar un beso

en las estrellas marinas

y que todo mi sufrimiento

se ahoga en el olvido

de las sirenas vestidas

en oro y plata

doctor cardiólogo

yo hago muchas preguntas

usted no sería el primero

en decir no puedo contestar

lo que necesita saber mujer

en unas horas estaré completamente

azul y gris con pena y el corazón

se desangra porque ya no puede mas

en su opinión cual es mi prognosis

señor doctor del corazón

lo tengo ya muy quebrado

hare mis planes finales

le acepto su beso

y buscare que los ángeles

negros me vengan a llevar

o encontro

é muito cedo

são às quatro

da manhã

e as sombras

que caem do lado de fora

eles falam sobre

minha vida e

não posso respirar

eles me dizem isso

você dr. azul

ele é um cardiologista superior

e o que você pode

diagnosticar e beijar

nas estrelas do mar

e que todo o meu sofrimento

afoga-se no esquecimento

das sereias vestidas

em ouro e prata

médico cardiologista

Eu faço muitas perguntas

você não seria o primeiro

em dizer que não posso responder

o que você precisa conhecer mulher

Dentro de algumas horas estarei completamente

azul e cinza com dor e coração

ele sangra porque ele não aguenta mais

na sua opinião qual é o meu prognóstico

senhor médico do coração

Eu já o tenho quebrado

Vou fazer meus planos finais

Eu aceito seu beijo

e vou procurar anjos

negros vêm para me levar

the appointment

it’s very early

it’s four o’clock

in the morning

and the shadows

that fall outside

they talk about

my life and

i can’t breathe

they tell me that

you dr. blue

are a superior cardiologist

and that you can

diagnose and kiss it away

in the stars by the sea

all of my suffering

drowns in oblivion

witnessed by mermaids dressed

in gold and silver

cardiologist doctor sir

i ask many questions

you would not be the first

in saying i can’t answer

what you need to know woman

in a few hours i will be completely

blue and gray with grief and a heart

that bleeds because it can’t take it anymore

in your opinion what is my prognosis

mr. heart doctor

it’s already broken

i will make my final plans

i’ll accept your kiss

and i will wait for the black angels

who come to take me

Photo mbrazfield 2019

haiku for Mark

grey eyes open shirt

i want you tonight lover

luck whistled on by

paging Dr. Burroughs, Dr. Burroughs please…

WS i don’t feel that well tonight

       the stars are covered in dust and grime

and the corner store doesn’t have the Windex i like

    i’ve listen to Thelonius on Bluetooth

          and Ravel’s Bolero till the landlady came

to shut me up     it wasn’t even that loud

          i struggle Billy Bull Baby  i see you

  in dreams of course with your suits and balding

               beautiful head  but your brain really turned me on

  i’ve been going back and forth for three days whether i should           

                           go to Daikokuya’s for a ramen bowl but i just don’t have the gumption

             i think i’m depressed again  the tears run like Jesse Owens  and i have no interest in making

                                         them stop

W  im in head first in the Interzone of my own doing

                 for hours i sit on the kitchen counter

looking out for the little brown birds who eat the last

        pomegranates of the winter    and wonder where the

first half part of my life went             but i worry more

    that i have no specific certainty where my last half is                             

                             going

   can you read me a bed time story   my favorite is “Green Eggs

                 and Ham”     

work by mbrazfield 2001

indications and usage

its not the lining of the heart or the medulla that is swollen it is pain of the spirit anger at the lot resentment at the lack of fairness and extreme abhorrence of the violence in my orbit of which you know that i know i cant fly its just wishful thinking a survival mechanism from a childhood taken so there is absolutely no need to pathologize my just being human i understand youre just the man with the accreditation and i can get that my other man under the bridges of my nation is working on the fly both bringing me the holy candy to take the edge away of the inevitable lesson of having to turn the other cheek but due to heavy handed legal messes summoned by the maternal book of ancient testament coming in direct conflict with the law of teeth for teeth coupled with Eve and Adam’s eye disease i bear the mark of all mankind and gift of favorite sons free will is not for you to harvest in the laboratories of supply at no discount price for first time users

first grade interpretation of the Old West

pausing by the pond 7 feet away from the peach trees left there by the chuck wagons of 1881 and the gingham bonnets stain upon the rocks placed there to dry in my western sun the Borox box is empty ma’ as the echoes of blond pigtails before the dawn of braces and Barbie dolls flowers dressed in yellow chipmunks draw a crowd and daddy presses on upon the kneeling giant mountains picking day and night sapping land from its sickled blood doing what men do but today my toothless grin will lend itself to draw a sigh from spirits past 1855 in the cavern of the snake

Queen Phoebe Anne

Photo by mbrazfield








poem one

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foreword

this haiku is not

about pretty flowers or

skies of blue and love

this second one is

to notify you that i

don’t write tenderly

hate me or like me

this is who i am just know

that you’re in my heart

Toviscangna

20190504_184043.jpg
Artist: Kira

sun

stroking

my back

train is coming

across the tracks slowly

the songs of birds echoed

as i fell seven feet deep across the

mountain where the red tail hawk she greeted me with a gown of platinum jade and jasper and in her sigh  

a woman mounted on Pegasus came to bless me she said to me the kingdom came and here we have the honorable nine dancing maidens whose Queendom we will share with you our guest

i raised my arms in disbelief and asked to be transported to the Southwest Museum where i was going the hawk she swooped and lifted me to show me the holy fields of rapture

we can arrange to take you back said the little maiden with tail of gold but we ask for a favor

you and your clan we hope respect the

remains of our sacred ancestors

i nodded yes and

in a flash

woke up

in

Toviscangna

routine

your lip moves a little

     eye lids wild   sleep takes you

i imagine i kiss you and i ever so lightly

    touch your arm           hold your calloused hand              your scent invades me     as i yearn to be taken

yet in your waking hours    you revoke permission of my eyes

                   landing on you

i could watch for ever     your gray eyes trap me

      you laugh at me    my smile drops in

as i feign glee outwardly      the flower i brought you

    has wilted away    then i sang you my love   on bloody knee

you stood over me    and shook your head