soy una sinvergüenza

tan dulces sus ojos gotas tostadas de caramelo en platos de praliné
tan fina que es su nariz salpicada con escamas de ámbar
sus pensamientos están tan confusos que tiemblan como dientes de león en la madrugada
tan tierna su sonrisa torcida sintiendo que soy una sinvergüenza

so sweet his eyes toasted caramel drops on praline platters
so fine his nose peppered
with speckles of amber flake
so confused his thoughts he shivers like dandelions at dawn
so tender his crooked smile
sensing that i am a scoundrel

mbrazfieldm (c) 2024

most honest answer from a man to me

 

even as you are
here bruised and
curled up begging
for a breath’s instant
of attention i am not
willing to give it
 
beyond fragile are you
so much that weeping
you can’t do so you
look to me for comfort
 
i admit that i take and take
and when i am asked to share
i only contribute hollow tin
words that dribble out
of a no longer necessary
part of me
 
i don’t pity you
and i realize that i don’t
really care about you
i string you along for
my base needs
 
your tears and hardships
disappointments and pains
do not steal neither my
appetite, rest or peace of mind
i am perfectly happy if
you die but if you live it
does not really matter
 
you are welcomed to
continue down this road
but if you turn back
i will not follow you
not one thing can make me
love you or want you
 

i can not say i need
anything you give
neither your joy or smiles
or sophomoric gifts have any
value to me
 
albeit if you want to enter
you have been warned of the risks
and know that i don’t love you

 

Harry and Jill

mbrazfield (c) 2023

Harry is from Cincinnati a failed Jack of all
Jill grew up in Amarillo
dish water blonde with cheap expensive tastes
Harry’s folks were working class
dad the pool hall alcoholic
mom hid hers in the laundry shed
back then Harry said we lived barely enough
by Sugar Hill between the parks
my paw a union man scraping for our meals
Jill watched his lips as the story wore
she’d look at me and snarl a bit
Harry said it’s a genetic tic
i puffed away on bidis and cloves
Jill kept her pain and her hatred deep in her soul
offering a place to stay to rest her bruised head
Harry spoke up and said ‘we ok’
her eyes caught the rat scampering across
the laundry she washed in the back of the lot
Jill turned away from our talk
Harry said Jill and i we’ll go for a walk
come again  tomorrow and i’ll reconsider your deal
but right now she’s got to deliver
i know it’s not right so don’t judge me bad
if she don’t like the life i give her
Jill is free to depart anytime
this is who we are
it’s not very much
Jill looked to the west stretching her arms
reaching out toward the brick wall
pulled out her pipe and started to smoke
Harry looked down with shame in his eyes
my clipboard is packed i’ve nothing to speak

her thighs

mbrazfield (c) 2023

near the exits she stalls
pondering how to leave
the halls are all she’s known
selling pussy causing brawls
she says in sobbing whispers
before reporting to dad
i’m too old for this journey
legs bruised lips split by the cops
she mouthed off while raising her fists to the sky
then a shooting took over
so they let her off
with a warning that judged her
deep in her soul
later come problems
with bottles of booze
her daddy just told her
go visit Bruce
she stops at the station
to clean up her thighs

today was hard

mbrazfield (c) 2023

today was hard
he broke the
fire sprinkler and
a flood washed
three floors down
today was hard
she woke from
elusive slumber with
hot wires slithering
through her brain
convulsions and saliva
at our feet
today was hard
he almost struck
her through the
chest where her
already shattered heart
bleeds beyond belief
today was hard
her poisoned tongue
on point ready
to kill both
of their fragile
egos in one
accusation of deviance
today was hard
there was nothing
resolved so tomorrow
we grow more
tired of this
insufferable calculated demise
today was hard

we

mbrazfield (c) 2016

blue sky the roads in your eyes
we smoked
outside after your show
the happy ones laughed and drank
we looked
and sniffed the air filled with LA River scent
we parted
i stayed behind with my pagodas my cheap wine and that g g allin tshirt