it took about three hours to get to Los Angeles Street
from Mission Avenue
with its grandiose blocks of junked cars
guys who waved flags like bull fighters
funneling you into their driveways
to get your muffler fixed for $75
i thought about Hemingway’s story
looking down at the dirty greased earth
wondering why i wasn’t dead that afternoon
trying to find the lesson or the meaning
of that certain event in my life
my body hurt
the concrete was harder than i had ever remembered
the worn sole of my one right Chinese girl shoe
mouthed slowly at every step i’d take
as it “peeoed-peeoed” at me
like baby birds demanding food
i thought of my left shoe
it became a casualty
strewn under a fire escape at Werdin Place
i imagined my shoe there
embalmed with bum urine and cigarette ash
never really felt self-pity
until that moment
my one black sock
still on my left foot
i stank like Camels and latex
i was dirty all the way
deep into the marrow
i consoled myself
tearing the bandages from my throat and my left ring finger
the bandages caused me to admit defeat
worst yet
victimhood
i sat on the curve of Sunset and Spring St.
to cry amongst the scent of taquitos and Peking duck
knock knock knock bang bang bang
“Ay! I goingg, cheeett!” said a husky voice from behind 303
“Ciao, Taino,” i whispered
“Ave Maria! Niňa, what happen to juu?! Alvaro, Alvaro! Cojeme el first aid kit!” tisked Taino
“I’m good doll. I just took a little beating late last night. I’ve already seen the doctors,” i explained
Taino dressed in a paisley green red and gold muumuu
ignored my answer
heavy mocha hands gently pulled and tugged
at the hoodie full of blood
his thick long red taloned fingers
negotiated with my bruises
fussing over me
Taino’s fiery short red bob
swooshed back and forth
past his round jowls
right below the heavy rouge line
he ordered his friend
to go get dragon won ton soup
Gatorade and ginger ale right quick
while Taino spoon fed me
he would rattle on
about simpler times
in the Puerto Rican mountains
about his mother’s cuisine
after a long day at work
Taino would look at me tenderly
eyelids thickly lacquered
blue shadow and black fake eye lashes
akin to window awnings
while he lined me
i’d caress his thick indigenous cinnamon face
that is why i named him Taino
“O.k. niňa vamos a dormir now mi reina.” he whispered in my ear
as he spooned me
telling his roommate Alvaro
not to answer the “gatdam” door to anyone
“Taino, do you believe in God?” i remember slurring
“Oh, si mami, claro.” Taino agreed in a hush
“Taino, is your mom happy you are like a woman? I am Taino, I love you,” those words crawled
out of my mouth
“Ay niňa, so many questions,” i could hear him sighing
a million miles away
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