sleep cradles me im on the lawn black rolled towel holds my neck im tired the train screams and my eyes pop open i get the sensation of German mustard on my tongue and think of mother we called her by her name an extra insurance policy of disconnection although i never knew what she really felt then the Pantry floats about memories of standing in line on Figueroa at the mouth of downtown when downtown was a city there are signs lights most unnatural sports sports drinks sell sell sell dont think dont think dont think i saw a man in Victoria’s Secret robes worn out of poverty then im tired no more then im angry again defeated and dissected from my nature patches of this and that round off the frustrations of seeing this world pass by falling into abyss and in all my time i have done nothing
DTLA
when women pray
it happens any time
in any place
around the universe
and even under ground
where they bury us
or in jars
where our chemical composition
lays just there in a powder
when women pray
they are really talking
across wet streets
between cars
right on the division line
of light and dark
they really get into it
a rhythm only she angels can hear
the he angels
they’re pictures on Valentines
sent to Hank Bukowski
when women pray
they think of everything
dirty diapers pregnancy tests
pubic hair the national crime rates
they think of their breasts
the bruises by their mate
the love of a mother
the words not really carefully thought through
but the universe gets the gist
cars come and go
rush hour in the heart
fear and joy at being alive
when women pray
music dances off their tongues
penetrating embankments
concrete or otherwise
the lilts and little valleys
in their vocal chords
algorithms to the stars
when i pray
i pray for a strength like theirs
blue steel
i’m feelin’ like a blue steel gun
with my fine determined sharp lines
my edges separate the somethin’ from the nothin’
and the come-hither handlin’ parts
sleek momma eye candy deluxe
making genitalia of all denomination shape and size
feel like a super daddy fuckin’ stud
i’m feeling like a blue steel gun
caught between your palm and thumb
a dialysis rig for your bad juice blood
my nuts bolts springs and inner workin’s
the physics and reasons in me aching
of no interest to you your heart or your mind
i’m feelin’ like a blue steel gun
remember in that case where you found me
promises dowries certificated truths
stroking of the barrels looking into soot
my trigger and your raging accusin’ fingers
you offered as my wedding band
i’m feelin’ like a blue steel gun
cast out after years of deeds gone wrong
silent spitting fire of your tongue
looking out my winda’ late at night
wonderin’ why you are the way you are
we chameleons tempering our feelin’s
showcased on a devil’s iron eye
cus we’re both rusted raw on the inside
faces looking up
precious shards of angel tears
above the Staples Center skyline
a helicopter or two
green heavy military
did you see the angels’ lace
made of colors not yet named
on the ground concrete pillows
bricks pipes crossing lines
multiplying multitudes
faces looking up
to wonder
how the rainbow got it’s high
its virtue and its glow
xray visions time flows through
yet we don’t know
we are the spectrum of it all
defcons and goddesses
there are yellow flowers honey sweet
butterflies floating in between
the thorns stick it to the sky
moons on time every month
silver matte and happy
but me thinks now and again
of defcon one through five
911 Cuban crisis kept at bay
yet with clear blue skies
hope
open enrollment
healthcare packages
named after heroes named
what difference does it do when little girls are getting maimed in mind body soul and spirit
today i watched and saw and read and talked to those who’ve climbed the ladders of success congratulations were in order
at the park the pecan squirrels were fed bits of corn and French bread crumbs
and when i turned my eyes to the west
tired with the wind that blows to burn
again i think of defcon one
and how since Lilith and the Eve
my kind has been regarded
but we’re still here with codes
of our own bestowed upon us
by the goddesses Grace Strength and
Thunder
smog pink shanks
there’s five green apples golden freckles on their skin
heater on cozy my hands icy
coffee molasses ice sugar cubes
glass tinted Armenian style
chest gentle heave breasts not in confinement
feet bare electric black polish on crooked toes from walking too early
eyes looking particularly nowhere
thinking about wishing to feel like a Michael Stipe song
standing fingertips wipe eyes from tears
Nina Simone where are you
ashtray heavy crystal lead a junk store whimsy buy
looking south outside the window
buildings tall short stout
like the teapot in that song
this linoleum floor where feet are flat
i witness her smog pink shanks
good morning Los Angeles
carora borealis
welcome back tonight
welcome back tonight you sad and pale wolf moon
i thought we were through
pacing and sinking i wrestled you out
only to find you in my heart
why do you come wolf moon unmovable fool
you are a life sentence
when i got born you were there to receive me
when peace took a powder
both faces of the clock urge me to tell you
welcome back tonight you sad and pale wolf moon
will you stop my doubt
i’ll keep pushing you outside
let me lie alone by this brook of dwindling despair
Billie with her lamenting mouth around midnight noon
“I’ve got those Monday blues
Straight through Sunday blues”
welcome back tonight you sad and pale wolf moon
sitting on rooftops you toast your light
on my wild girl hair
with my fingers cramped pull up a comet
lay your silver fire on me
don’t hide away after our tasting
who fell into whose clutches
welcome back tonight you sad and pale wolf moon
rarity
little green cactus
kneeling in the sunlight
coffee soil all around
its white pot-bellied pot
heart calm palms dry
no dust storms in the lights
crooner serenades me
tells me about the days of wine and roses
that have left an unclear life
thoughts dawning
eyes drawn into a book shelf
toys pictures memories
rubbing elbows with Buk and the Bard
while the cats purr the moment away
still my heart calm
arteries stretching out like tiny arms
shut my eyes and wonder how
i can be happier
shine my ghost
eyes still sleepy
stiff coffee steam
outside ghost droplets
peek into windows
of careless dreamers
still life kitchen
soul stare bright
today no pain
just gray scale
melodies down below
rise like sun
shine my ghost
away rest now
lillies soon grow
fog ghost soul
evaporate into sky
words less spoken 