Poetry

i too am wise

/ mbrazfieldm / 2 Comments

you’ve made it this far

         at the front step of mystery

i am sweet enter me you are man

    answer my question of why all is all

tell truth at risk of enticing your anger  you know

       i too am wise

deep is the diamond there’s a reason He hid it there

     you are the key to unleashing continued life

but where did it go wrong the seed it falls to nothing

      where did i lose center when did i gain pain

look into me and dare say it is Eve’s fault

           i ask you are man where does omnipotence end

i am the vessel the chalice the grail in code stop chasing your tail

     let us grow together why place your foot on my neck

does it please you to see me ground into the dirt

    my legs are strong my arms hold the children from

      the poisonous suns

i too am wise

     man come into my center at times i too am harlot

         and i become like a god my brother man

  my mind gets pulled into a thousand places

          but i know that what the king wants

               i am your pleasure the reason you exist

enter my warmth the ecstasy of my womb engulf yourself in the holy

     mine are the rainbows the rains and the wars

       mine are the secrets kept between my legs

          fools who thought of taming me

              have not quite made it back

to trip

/ mbrazfieldm / 7 Comments

shivering in the bedroom

trying to find a slightly less mended Chanel

middle aged

anxiety on my tongue

finger nail polished half chewed off

scar tissue protrudes on my left knuckle

the difference in the mosh pits was

we all beat

each other up together

the other morning i went out

to see some band play

they weren’t quite what i remembered

slower thicker grayer

yet still crazy

jacked up rockin

in some of our heads

high on beet juice and weed

when i stand in my room

i don’t want to just be rockin in my head

i should go to the beauty clinic

and laser off this scar

but i’m not ashamed by it

besides i might read Bukowski in the waiting room

and offend some old Barbie

i’d like to be banged by that bass player

and have him pluck on my thing

and then there’s Beck on Mt. Washington

singing Spanish riffs into the mike

the band has never heard of me

but we both know how to twirl and punch

and they have to go home to their wives

standing in my bedroom

my moves aren’t quite as swift

the best band i ever knew went disco

and the new bands lack the rage

i try to start the mosh pit

and give the bass player my number

but they twitter about health

things

yoga things

beet juice recipes

CBD things

i watch the boba settle in my milk tea

i know what my fate is

but it’s too gruesome to process

i won’t land the bassist

cloudy head

/ mbrazfieldm / 25 Comments
pic by mbrazfield 2019

i didn’t always know

that life would be

ok

i was never sure

who would be there

but

my understanding of the

workings of the world

would

arrive some day i

guessed a lot at

seven

so i watched the

war planes fly fast

t.v.

kept my heart curious

about how life could

have

been but didn’t quite

happen that way for

me

but i have ten

fingers and ten toes

i

can still walk and

talk although nonsense it

may

be and i can

laugh and sing off

key

and i can find

those old reels of

the

blitzkriegs and still feel

the sadness for the

world

my head those clouds

i somehow knew well

just

a child i was

lost in the luftwaffe

of

life’s adults who were

possibly less well equipped

than

me a little kid

mastering the power to

heal

a vesper

/ mbrazfieldm / 4 Comments

sun and moon greet and kiss

either side of their cosmic cheeks

today i don’t walk among the people

for romance style gain or art

it took time much of it

even heavy parallels to this universe

of squalor in carnival color

today i’ve come down deep

into the cracks in everything

so said Leonard

i small as i am look inside

the glass now empty the pipes

rigs foils all of it wasted away

in an instant of solemn mystic revolution

soft and quiet in the rancid room

on the corner of this street

sons of man queens and goddess

the stars are coming out

from the ancient rubble

from whence angels and demons fall

to look at me not my disease

i grotesquely beautiful in triumph

i’m over me released myself per se

to the right the ruins of the past

to the left the fragile bridge i’ll tread

across to take upon my care

the tender new i

made even by the equinox of life

shards

/ mbrazfieldm / 1 Comment

rain and Halloween 14 lost boygirl

LA let’s play East H is the oyster

let’s go nowhere what have i got to lose

streaks of time fingers and others touching

what was part of a dowry gone poisoned

my turn to burn the cancer of this pain

rage shame weakness and hate

the mark of incomprehensible

where did it go wrong

i’ll say it plain

they took my innocence

my sense of self

spirit and mind

and you expect me to shut up

the weed is grown

and life takes course

confusion sets the stage

and the ocean swallowed me whole

shoreline

/ mbrazfieldm / 3 Comments

the nutty wafts of kelp breeze

wrap around my body

looking at the waves they crash

the little crabs shake

their tiny pinchers at them

they all just laugh  

their foamy locks behind them

my fingers remind me

that i’m digging in the sand

i smile on my left side

two young lilac gulls screech

over some meaty mussels

my attention zooms in at the ferris wheel

closing my eyes

subtle waves of nauseous panic come

but you’re gone

your arms not there to hold me

your lips can not whisper

your hungry desires in my ear

your wandering finger tips caressing

the nipples on my breasts

as i whispered i want you

we both laughed

the piercings in your lips

they caught my hair

we clasped tattooed hands

the deepness in your voice

only for me

subtle wind moans

only to be cut by youthful laughter

holding my knees

those demons prick at me

your notes didn’t answer my questions

mommy issues

/ mbrazfieldm / 1 Comment

it drips and mingles

marries with the blood

soothsayer to what comes

slashes through the confusion

of the heart ethics

of good and not

so much evil is

her delicious name i

a groupie of her’s

claimed soul punch the

mirror to break the

soul it’s cloaked in

tones of luke warm

vengeance clouded in the

wine and chemicals entwined

don’t need your knife

to stab my back

i can self destruct

in searing pleasure do

you know what love

is i didn’t think

so and words fall

from your corpsely lips

corrupting my intentions to

provide a safety switch

to the runaway train

that is my conscience

rage and anger exotic

sisters of pain and

trickery demons extraordinaire in

the doctrine of auto

annihilation i rebuke myself

turn to junkydom cliff

time out

/ mbrazfieldm / 5 Comments

i’ve made you angry

i question not to judge

not to hold accountable

it’s just self preservation

i refuse to die of a venereal disease

a few months back i had a crush

i cast out my fisher girl’s fly

you nibbled i invited

you ignited a fire that spread too quickly

you an excellently talented lay

me a very willing convenience fuck

from the beginning of the race

my stats were clearly posted

of broad mind and precocious personality

but i only make you angry

when i really don’t mind

if you suck the neighbor’s cock

i’m cool if you want exploration

don’t politicize the situation babe

let me remind you for your record

you came on your own to me

i’ll take the tumble with some protection

a girl needs some stress release too

but don’t give me bullshit excuses

when you know what i’ve been through

i’m crushing on your lustful ways

and the sweetness that you randomly give

when we lock lips and genitals

the gods above do sing

you can get angry at me

for leaving you mid way

i’ll overlook a lot of things

but don’t think that for a second

you’ll have me as your slave

you buy we fry

/ mbrazfieldm / Leave a comment

my favorite chair

are the sidewalks

those in the 20’s and 30’s

edge of downtown streets

a mix of rustic houses

shacks and alley ways

some with flowers

some with trash

my favorite chair

is not comforting at first

it affords me front row view

to the less palatable aspects

of genteel society

exposed vaginas cocks

twisted tongues

defecation out of

hundreds of orifices

then there’s the strip mall chair

with the upright and honest

vendor my favorite one

is Donicio from Panama

he has a way of telling

funny stories

across from there

is another chair

‘you buy, we fry’

it’s mostly busy

on the sabbath

my eyes their

veils of formal education

lifted and the life of life

exposed to all my senses

there is something thrilling

about hopscotching through

dog shit in a city

that treats us all the same

my favorite chair

in the bars of the people

although people aren’t

what they used to be

my amiga Casimira

has the latest I Phone

when i want to look in to

her deep brown eyes

and have her Oaxacan accent

transport me to another land

especially on jury duty day

to no avail

i lost my friend

to the latest pop up store

at the end of most days

when the journey’s done

i go home to my derelict

dog and two jaded kitties

with caffeine in one hand

Phoebe Ann the cat on my lap

the memories of my rest stops

deposited silently

in the removable data bank

we interrupt this program…

/ mbrazfieldm / 7 Comments

mind twisted and turned out inwardly

heart full of bewilderment

spirit dull cracked in some areas

soul as is no refunds

aware that privilege was not a commodity

we all have our crosses to bear and walls to wail upon

boundless and untethered loyalty to any attention giver

and then the sons of Adam distraught

ended a course of life

at that moment of death and rebirth

spirit began to take shape

the eyes opened the lung breathed

the palm uncurled and the mind sobered

the heart beat lips parted in silence

what do i believe

we are still here the force the pulse

the breath of God

in spite of my will or yours

we are here the ancient brick and mortar

passed through the stream of our common blood

flows in rivers of love cleaning the puddles of blood

tears we have all shed across this world