los soles no miran

en tu fiebre duermes cada noche

reina de la orilla del mar

gritas y pateas a tus soldados

cuando te quieren llevar

a tu palacio en los altos de esta cuidad

tus mandos sin fuerza

tus joyas sin brillo

y tus zapatillas de seda

solo son heridas de la vida

Norma del Reino de Guadalajara

que haces en mi ciudad

perdida de noche

invisible en los días

la luna no brilla

los soles no miran

que tuyos serán los cielos


os sóis não vêem

na sua febre você dorme todas as noites

rainha da praia

você grita e chuta seus soldados

quando eles querem te levar

para o seu palácio nas alturas desta cidade

seus controles sem força

suas jóias maçantes

e seus chinelos de seda

eles são apenas feridas da vida

Norma do Reino de Guadalajara

o que você está fazendo na minha cidade

perdida à noite

invisível nos dias

a lua não brilha

os sóis não parecem

que vocês serão os céus


the suns don’t see

in your fever you sleep every night

queen of the seashore

you scream and kick at your soldiers

when they want to take you to your palace

on the heights of this city

your orders without power

your jewels dulled

and your silk slippers

they are only wounds of life

Norma of the Kingdom of Guadalajara

what are you doing in my city

lost at night

invisible during the days

the moon does not shine

the suns do not see

that you will inherit the heavens

a polvo regreso

yo se que será el último beso

que juegas conmigo como juegan la lotería

entiendo que solo soy una muñeca fea

pero de algo te sirvo tal vez

con las cicatrices que me he ganado

comprare respeto y felicidad yo sola puedo

y cuando veo que es tu llamada

no tengo fuerza de correr de ti

tus brazos me empujan a los cielos

tus ojos ruegan que quede en infiernos

tu cobardía destruirá mi espíritu y alma

viento triste y penitente me nombrara Camilla


a pó retornar

Eu sei que será o último beijo

que você joga comigo como eles jogam na loteria

Eu entendo que sou apenas uma boneca feia

mas eu estou servindo você talvez

com as cicatrizes que eu ganhei

Eu vou comprar respeito e felicidade eu sozinho posso

e quando eu vejo qual é o seu chamado

Eu não tenho forças para fugir de você

seus braços me empurram para o céu

seus olhos rezam para que esteja no inferno

sua covardia vai destruir meu espírito e alma

vento triste e penitente vai me chamar de Camilla


to the dust i return

i know it will be the last kiss

that you play with me like they play the lottery

i understand that i’m just an ugly doll

but maybe i’m serving you

with the scars that i have earned

i will buy respect and happiness i alone can

and when see that it’s your call

i have no strength to run from you

your arms push me to the heavens

your eyes beg that i stay in hell

your cowardice will destroy my spirit and soul

sad and penitent wind will name me Camilla

-para John Fante com admiração

John

along the holy water hole

we stand and ponder leaving Baal

it cannot not be that simple

just a dunk in the pond

we stand and ponder leaving Baal

anointed in the river wave

anointed by eternal flame

re-birth as we kneel

pondering about leaving Baal

and then the Son comes to show us how

through shaky fingers you delivered, John

the One we left Baal for

welcome Charles Bronson

the Orpheum was the place

to be on Saturday afternoons

with the heat and the stale buttered vapors

seats made of coils some stuffing and velvet

were a dollar 25 each for a matinee with Bruce Lee

dragons and fists delayed come backs and flying weapons

id sit in the dark tootsie rolls melting in my palms

waiting for my Da to bet on his horses

and roll with one of his Misses

during intermission id turn my head round

and was quickly turned to stone by the shine

of the projector and then the lights would

kneel down and welcome Charles Bronson

with the guns and the cars and the wishes

once upon a time

unlike Joanie and Chachi

the side of your salty neck

was black with my eyeliner

your purple nails tore at my back

while i tried to pull down my pants

you had insisted on wearing your dad’s kilt

to a Circle Jerks recital

and with breathless whispers we gave up

i pulled up and you pulled down

but as a consolation prize

you let me grope your jockey ass

as the first riff of

“I just want some skank” started

Brahman

Taino although you’re not here anymore the Nirvana Arms still stand tall and even though our friendship was perplexing you taught me morality and how to see the goodness in the least expected people decency is at times not where we think it might or should be

And remember Waverly she’s a lawyer now but back then she was a lost kid we all hated you for calling the authorities on her folks for neglect although it was true we were mostly just tax exemptions religious guilt rescue pregnancies and a terrific pain in the ass to them but you saw us as diamonds in a very rough and unjust place

I learned how to walk in heels layer foundation insert a tampon and fill out job applications because of you and you sat me down to explain why i shouldn’t take my life all the while inside you were already dying against your will

No one came to say goodbye to you not even me and all i could think about was how you tore me away from rapists on Werdin Place and held me tight after the cops came never judged the look of my veins and gave me compassion at levels that until this day it’s so hard to take

Once in a while i see a strawberry blond wig at the Goodwill and smile or at Walgreens the cheap acrylic nail kits you were fond of tug at my very soul at Macy’s the tropical prints you admired and honored me in choosing for you and when we got into trouble and the hoosegow loomed in our future you were always a father and when needed for love advice calling off the school vice squad or a tender non judgmental kick in the ass you were always our mother

Toviscangna

20190504_184043.jpg
Artist: Kira

sun

stroking

my back

train is coming

across the tracks slowly

the songs of birds echoed

as i fell seven feet deep across the

mountain where the red tail hawk she greeted me with a gown of platinum jade and jasper and in her sigh  

a woman mounted on Pegasus came to bless me she said to me the kingdom came and here we have the honorable nine dancing maidens whose Queendom we will share with you our guest

i raised my arms in disbelief and asked to be transported to the Southwest Museum where i was going the hawk she swooped and lifted me to show me the holy fields of rapture

we can arrange to take you back said the little maiden with tail of gold but we ask for a favor

you and your clan we hope respect the

remains of our sacred ancestors

i nodded yes and

in a flash

woke up

in

Toviscangna

un Tango

calma

se va

azul adentro de

mi

corazón que

late por ti

las

luces juguetonas

me llevan perdida

se

ríen de

mi dando pasos

circulares

buscando salida

de tu prisión




um tango

calma

vai azul

dentro meu coração

que

bate por

você o luzes

brincalhonas

eles me

levam perdido isso

eles

riem meus

passos tomando circular

procurando

saída da

sua prisão


a Tango

calm

it goes

blue inside my

heart

that beats

for you the

playful

lights they

take me lost

they

laugh at

me taking circular

steps

looking for

an exit from

your prison

2 steps

drift to sleep

under the hazy sky

blue cowboy boots

laying down in my truck

Twinkie crumbs

on the corners of my mouth

my left braid coming undone

the memory comes in chunks

hope to sleep

under a halogen light

no shoes or socks

stuffed into the couch

kale smoothie

not on my tongue

my mane’s too tame

the thoughts torn asunder